A lot of people don’t get the 88-second track called ‘Waiting’ on my EP, ‘Swallowing Death, Breathing Life.’ It sounds strange, it is repetitive, and it is easy to pass on by. I want connect it to my life today. And it will probably connect to you in some way too.
Waiting sucks. I hate it. I fit into the culture of entitlement. I’m a type-A, competitive artist that is a professional at throwing fits when I don’t get my way – interesting combination, I know.
Obviously God understands how awful I am at having patience. I also think He has a grand sense of humor – or maybe He just wants me to be the best person I can be. I don’t know. But I do know that my patience is often tested.
When there is a goal in mind, I run. When there is a dream on my heart, I start. When there is a hurt in the world, I aim to bring healing. And you know what? I’m still running. I’m still doing. And I’m still healing.
The sound to this track is haunting, and if I am being honest, it is angry. I wrote it that way because that is where I’m at in my place of waiting. I am confused and I am angry.
Maybe you are there with me today. You’re waiting. I believe that completion is a major chord waiting to resolve. It will only resolve when the composer wants it to. Our life isn’t a beginning or an end. It is a moment. Our life is today. So, in this waiting, I’ll be angry and I won’t understand it, but I will continue to do. Besides, when the chord resolves, the song comes to in an end. The people fold up there chairs and they leave. I want to live.
Whatever you are doing today, don’t stop. Please. Be angry. Stomp your feet. Curse. Scream. Cry. Throw things. Who cares?
Just don’t stop doing. Never give up.